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인터스텔라 (2014)

Interstellar 

8.1

감독

크리스토퍼 놀란

출연

매튜 매커너히, 앤 해서웨이, 마이클 케인, 제시카 차스테인, 케이시 애플렉

정보

SF | 미국 | 169 분 | 2014-11-06

글쓴이 평점  

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감독은 Gravity 에 비하기 싫어 Gravity 관람을 거부했단다. 단호함은 플러스 고집은 굳이 요소. 

보다 미화 할 수 있는 우주, 물리, 다차원 세상의 아쉬운 시각적 표현. 

죽음에 가까운, 사고요소를 지닌 선택과정, 희생의 여부, 혼자 버려졌다는 암담함 등의 심리적 요소를 드라마화. 

내용보다 한 번은 볼 만한이라는 주위 반응에 비해, 볼 거리는 아쉽지만 내용은 참신했던 느낌. 소소히 웃었고 많이 울었다. 

가장 크고 비교적 월등히 우수한 장점이라면 이 시대에 필요한 물리에 대한 호기심을 유발하는 긍정적인 투자. NASA, CERN, 시공이라는 어려워 지루 할 수 잇지만 중요한 분야에 대중의 관심을 끄는 힉스 이 후의 가장 큰 이슈. 10대들에게 꼭 굳이 권해야 할 영화.

확신이 없다는 것에 대한 두려움 그리고 걱정. 그 모든 것은 버릴 수는 없지만 할 수 있는 것은 리스크를 줄이는 것 뿐. 

할 수 있다는을 넘어 잘 할 것이라는 자신감은 항상이지만 사라질 수 만은 없는 걱정. 그 긴장감을 지울 수 없는 것은 실수는 사람이 잘 지낼 때에 일어나는 것이라는 믿음 때문. 걱정을 동반한 초심에서보다 안정을 기준에 둔 익숙함에서 일어나는 예상치 못 함이 나를 흐트릴 것. 

나는 평균일 뿐이고 그것에서 안정감을 두는 것. 나의 길은 이미 만들어진 것이고 그 길을 함께 걷고 안내 해 줄 많은 도움이 가깝다는 것을, 기억. 

회사라는 대학원이라는 나에게는 생소하지만 우리에게 보편적인 길들을 걸으며, 나에게 어려움이지만 도움은 흔하다는 안정을 마음에 두고 차분히 지내는 하루, 학기, 학년. 

요즘 왜인지 외로운 마음이 유난히 많이 드는 11월이다. 눈이 내릴 듯 공기는 차되 이롭게도 하늘은 파아랗고 비또한 흐르지 않는 시애틀의 2014 겨울 입동. 나는 나의 꿈을 살고있다. 상상에서 그리던 이상적인 20대 중반의 그림은 현실이 되었다. 원하다던 할 것이라던 학업도 결혼 계획도 모두 이루었다. 마음도 신체적 건강도 나의 이상에서 멀지 않은 지금, 외로움은 사치이고 궁상이거늘 - 가슴에 공허함이 문뜩씩 트인다.  나는 무엇을 바라는가, 욕심을 내리자.

공부를 한다. 이 얼마나 자유롭고 마음 편안하고 행복한 생활인가. 배움에 즐거움을 주요 그리고 궁극적 목표로 두는 하루하루를 산다는 것이 행복하지 않을 리가 없다. 

부모님과 통화를한다. 엄마 아빠는 하루하루, 지난 해와 크게 다르지 않은 생활을 생활하신다. 몇 해 전과 비교하면 심적인 변화는 크실 것이다. 해마다 안정을 평안을 향하시는 부모님을 보며, 멀지만 점점 가까워지는 나와 부모님 사이의 거리를 느끼며, 진정한 everyday hero 는 엄마 아빠임에 매 번 감동.

욕심을 내리자. 과분한 이 생활에서, 

삶은 없고 생활일 뿐이다. 한 시간이 한 나절이되고, 하루가 모여 이틀이 되고, 시험을 세네개 치르면 한 주가 지나고, 그렇게 일주일들이 모여 한 달, 한 학기가 되고 - 궁극적 시험에 시간과 생활을 투자. 한 학기, 한 수업을 통과하면 다음 수업을듣고, 그렇게 하루씩 한 시간 씩 한 학기 한 학년 씩 지내다보면, 그것이 종잇 조가리가되고. 내가 너에게 선행 하나 아픔 하나, 아쉬움은 줄이고 감사함을 극대화하여, 감사함과 감동으로 하루 이틀을 지내다보면 우리는 우리가되고 - 아무런 감흥 없는 시간에도 편안함 혹은 서운함 따위의 감정이 존재하고. 시간을 함께 함으로 만으로도 거리는 멀어지기도 다가와지기도하는, 날들이 너랑 나를 우리로 - 빚더라.

would you rather me 의견을 고려한다는, 묻는다는 - 나의 선택이 나만의 것이 아니라는 공유 - 그 생소함과 그 가치. 배워야 할, 습관화해야 할 변화들.

눈물 

근래 눈물량 급증. 이유 가능 요소들을 생각하자면 수면시간 줄어듬 - 가장 고민, 스트레스 나쁘지 않음, 학업 및 학교 생활 만족, 대인관계 평균. 감수성의 변화는, 크지는 않은 듯. 잠은 너무나 어렵다, 이번 주 하루도 4시간 이상 잠을 들지 못하였다. 시험과 과제 퀴즈 하나 씩 뿐이었고 심지어 이번 학기 중 유일하게 랩도 없는 주였다. 행복도는 크게 다르지 않고 오히려 스트레스 지수는 소량 저하. 마음이 비교적 편해지어 행복 및 긍정에 집착하는 마인드가 놓인 점도 있음. 예를 들어 오랜만에 아침에 자전거를 탔는데 이전에 '환상'이라고 표현했을 풍경이 '너무 예쁨' 정도로 다가 오더라는. 

눈물, 특정히 눈물이 많아진 이유는 의문, 이지만 나 자신에 대한 의존도를 높혀야겠다는 생각. 매 번 내가 아닌 외부적 요소로 인한 눈물. 바라지 않아야지. 

근래 외롭다는 감정이 자주이다. 잦은 빈도는 고등학교 이후로 처음이고, 비교하자면 오히려 지금의 빈도가 높다, 3배 가까이. 만족은 어디일까, 불가능. 밝음 밝기, 보다 더 더 밝음을 추구해야한다는 마음이 든다. 반면 굳이라는 갈등. 나는 나에게 무엇을 바라는가. 

만족은 없다, 나 뿐이랴 - 타인에게서도 마찬가지. 차이라면 나에게는 만족이라는 단어가 적합하지만 타인에게는 바램의 유무가 존재 할 뿐. 나에 대한 바람은 끝이 없고, 타인에 대한 바람은 없애려 노력. you're tired too 공감하려는 노력, 이 필요하다. 

design 

예쁜 것이 좋다, 물질적인. 지난 금요일 오랜만에 쇼핑을 갔는데 그 행복감이란. 의류, 가구, 화장품, 전시, 등 .. 이것 저것 만지고 맡고, 보고, 바르고. 가로수에 휘감은 연말 조명이며, 자주도 바뀌는 쇼 디스플레이 등, 공간을 사람음 꾸밈에 대한 애착이 해마다 는다. 

not the biggest control freak of nature but definitely a difficult fool

letting things to and letting things be. i talk of virtues i cannot practice. need to take steps back and let go and breathe - know things are good in nature and in result. prioritize - remember that my moment of ugly means nothing. break and overcome.

엄마가 오전미사 다녀왔냐는 질문에 자느라 저녁미사 가겠다 했더니 게을러 빠졌다는 핀잔 .. 에 몇 시간 동안 열댓번 이상 생각나고 눈물이 흐르렁 .. 게으르다는 말이어서 그렇게, 더구나 마냥 안아주는 엄마에게서 라는 생각에 지금도 눈물 .. 예민함이 고조된 요즘이기도하고, 겹치고 덮쳐서 서운함 max. 

집에가서 마냥 종일 잠만자고싶다, 실컷 아, 무것도 하지 않고.

can you see it 

the worst is over 

the monsters in our head are scared of love 

falling people

listen up 

it's never too late to change our love

so don't let them steal your light 

don't let them break your stride

there's life on the other side 

and you'll see all the rain drops falling behind

make it up tonight 

its the revolution 

nearing 2015, wishing the same wish every year. people, or i do not, or have not changed. it's never too late to change. life on the other side, all the raindrops falling behind.

"사랑하는보딸아안녕 요즈음어려운공부하느라너무힘들고하루하루일정이너무타이트해서여유로운시간한번가져보지못하는것같아 안타깝구나마치아빠가지금까지살아왔던지난날을생각해보니 주어진환경탓도있겠고아빠자신이그릇된생각으로너무시간에쫒기는생활에우리집안에보물스런윤영이한테윤영이가한창자라날때아빠가제대로따뜻한사랑을보어주지못한것같아정말미안하구나"

dad, called. 그 동안 함께 시간 보내지 못 하여, 엄마에게 너를 맡기어, 사랑 마음껏 주지 못하여 미안하다는 아빠. 그나마 함께보내는 시간동안 여행 중에도 안하무인으로 아빠된 모습을 보여주시지 못하고 인상을 찌푸린 모습을 보여주어 마음이 아프시단다. 기억에서 흐려 기억나지 않는다고, 아빠가 잘해주신 기억이 훨씬 많이 남는다고 말씀드리니, 정말? 이라며 목이 메이신다. mom, called. 아빠와 통화했다고 말씀드리니 옆에 계셨단다. 아빠가 그리 눈물을 흘리시는 모습을보니 엄마도 마음이 슬프셨다며, 새로운 가족을 맞으면서, 자신에 대해 돌아보는 시간이라 말씀하신다. 아빠도 누군가의 아들임을, 문득 기억. 

고등학교 시절 여름방학, 반바지에 티셔츠 차림으로 매일 서점에서 책들을 뒤적이던 시간들이, 유난히 그립고 다행스럽다. 

근래의 나는 투정이 늘었고 너무나 당당하다. 눈빛에 힘이 들어가고 나의 언성을 높히지 않더라도 말의 속도와 목소리에 상대에대한 부정이 명백하다. 반성 ..

날씨 

이게 날씨야? 싶을 정도로 춥지는 않지만 어둡고 서늘하니 피곤. 4시 지나면 어두운 것이 자야 할 것 같은 .. 짧아진 하루. 올 해는 강우량이 적어뵌다, 다행이다.

가족

아빠 생신이다. 아빠 생신을 함께 지낸게 언제인지. 이렇게 우리는 일년 한 두어번 만나는 사람들이 되었다. 그래도 가족인지라, 감사하고 그립다. 오히려 그래서 보다 애틋한지도 모르겠다. 아빠는 오늘 하루하신지. 엄마에게 전화를 건다. 아빠 생일은 음력이란다, 언제인지 모르겠다. 은행이시란다. 졸리다니까 얼른 자라고 하신다. 할 말있으면 언제든지 하라고 하신다, 들어주신다며. 사랑한다고 말씀해주신다. 보고싶다 엄마 .. 가까이 계셨으면 좋겠다 엄마아빠.

어서 12월이 되어 집에 가고싶다. 가족이 유난히 보고싶은 아쉬운 겨울이다. 단순 그러한 나이여서인가, 생활 패턴이 변해서인가, 의지 할 곳이 부족한가, 모르겠다. 심지어 동생마저 보고싶다.

학교 

체력이 부족하다. 학교는 너무나 많은 시간과 에너지를 요구한다. 잠과 기운이 늘 늘 부족하다, 충족 불가능. 낮은 성적은 보람 마저 녹여버려 사람을 지치게한다. 그래도 좋은 성적이 있으니 노력이 헛되지만은 않구나 위로. 혼자가 아니라는 것 또한 큰 위안. 90명 모두 함께 수고한다는 사실이 어딘가 다행이다. 서로 챙기려는 자세 또한 감사. 

학부와 너무나 다르다. 경쟁에 능숙한, 우수한 성적에 익숙한, 필요 이상을 추구하는 학생 집단. 고만고만 옆에 두고 보니 비교되지만 다들 빈틈이 적다. 그 만큼 전문과목임에도 불구하고 반 평균 점수 우월, 놀라울 따름. 커리큘럼에, 프로그램 랭킹에 큰 자부심을 둔 교수님들. 같은 학위를 위해 설계된 많은 약대들이 있지만, 보다 특별한 프로그램을 진행하겠다는 사명감. 학생 한 명 한 명 관리하는 세심함. 학부처럼 평타치면 구렁이 담 넘어가 듯 묻혀 갈 수 없는 환경. 요구사항이 많지만 그 만큼 전체 평균도 상향되는 시스템.

올 해 만족도

상당히 만족. 

돌아보기 - 보다 곧게 앉기. 편안한 마음과 표정으로 걷기. 행복 표현에 과하고 어려움에 침착하기. 잊지 않기 초심, 매일 걷기 차분히. Realizing the changes in my posture and attitude. Reflecting for few minutes, has been a while. Remembering the distance and making efforts to maintain.

know what to do. 

at times you wonder if any is worth the trouble, because troubles get tiring. but then you realize, that you know what to do because you must. so you act. and initially you're nervous and excited; scared so you pretend. 

숨을 깊이 들이마시고,
공기 중에 있는 모든 축복이
당신의 몸속으로 들어와 세포 하나하나에
퍼지기를 기원하세요. 그리고 천천히 숨을
내쉬면서, 당신 주위로 많은 기쁨과 많은 평화를 
뿌려요. 이렇게 열 번을 반복합니다. 그러면 
당신 자신을 치유하고, 동시에 세상을
치유하는 데 일조할 겁니다.


- 파울로 코엘료 알레프

spend more time doing than concerning

3 ways a person can change

1. spend time differently 

2. be in a different location

3. meet different people

thinking to change does not change 

it feels lonely when you cut yourself out for them and it feels as if they wouldn't do so for you. and yet you continue to cut into your own for the sake of them, because it hurts less to let them cut you than to have you hurt them, and have them tell you that they hurt because of you. you tell them a and they say no. that a is not so, and that such is because of b. that there are other reasons and that you reasons are of less significance. 

to want something for self, and feel like it is selfishness when it should be a given. when wanting becomes, seems greed. when receiving requires request, is perhaps what loneliness means. realizing that even blunt requests lead to no change, defines loneness. mentioning an issue only to be reasoned, rather than it be heard nor accepted. 바람이 사치로 느껴짐이 외로움인가보다. 

i feel as if you do not love me, and that you simply need me for your sake. that you only want and favor me when i am happy and good to you. that my happiness is of no or of less significance. that your happiness comes from my good doings to you and much less of the reciprocal. 

to say things of no meaning, to exchange words insignificant. 

표어	Lux Sit (빛이 있으라)
설립	1861년
종류	주립
총장	마이클 영 (Michael K. Young)
국가	미국
위치	워싱턴주 시애틀
학생 수	학부: 27,868 대학원: 13,081
상징	허스키(Huskies)
웹 사이트	http://www.washington.edu/

워싱턴 대학교(영어: University of Washington,줄여서 UW)는 미국 워싱턴주 시애틀에 있는 주립 대학이다. 캠퍼스의 크기는 약 2.845㎢이며 그 안에 기숙사를 포함한 213개 동의 건물이 있다. 현재 구글, 마이크로소프트, 애플의 본거지인만큼 세계 내 IT계열로 강한 대학으로 손꼽힌다. 특히 시애틀 출신인 빌 게이츠는 지금까지 매년 워싱턴 대학교에 기부 중이다. 워싱턴 대학교는 미국 북서부 지방에서 가장 큰 규모의 대학이며, 미국 서부지방에서는 가장 오래된 대학이기도 하다. 오래되고 이름난 대학인만큼 교정도 고풍스럽고 아름다워 영화 해리 포터 개봉이후 호그와트처럼 웅장하고 눈부시다며 미국의 호그와트라고도 불린다. 보통 줄여서 UW (U-Dub:유덥으로 발음) 이라고 부른다. 시애틀의 번화가(Downtown) 에서 약 5마일 떨어져 있다. 학생들의 학교 만족도는 높으며 다른 주립대학들과 비교했을 때 학비가 비싼 편에 속한다.

메인 캠퍼스인 시애틀 (Seattle) 캠퍼스 외에도 타코마 (Tacoma), 바슬 (Bothell) 캠퍼스가 있다. 페이지에 기재된 워싱턴 대학교의 순위는 시애틀 캠퍼스 기준이다. 2011년, Academic Ranking of World Universities 는 워싱턴 대학교를 세계 16위에 꼽았다.^[1] 임상의학대학원, 약리학 에 대해 세계 3위를 차지하였다.^[2]

2014년 가을에 입학할 신입생의 경우 지원자 58%인 24,540명이 합격했으며 신입생들의 평균 대학수학능력시험SAT 성적은 2400만점에 1883점이었다.^[3]

지금까지 총 12명의 노벨상 수상자, 13명의 퓰리처상 수상자, 1명의 필즈상 수상자를 배출했다.

2014년에 미국내 권위적인 US News & World Report에 의하면 조지워싱턴대학교, 오하이오 주립대, 투레인 대학교, 그리고 텍사스 주립대와 함께 미국내에서 공동으로 52위를 기록하였

다.^[4]

2012년에는 영국 타임스 지가 선정한 세계대학랭킹 중 25위를 차지하였다.^[5]

2012년에는 매년 미국 국내 대학 순위를 발표하는 시사 주간지 US News & World Report에서 의과대학원의 일차진료(Primary Care) 관련하여 미국내 1위를 차지하였다.^[6]

^wiki

University of Washington 

School of Pharmacy 

Mission & Vision

Foundation and Values

The School of Pharmacy is an inclusive community that fosters an environment supportive of advancing our goals and enabling us to take active roles in regional and global initiatives relating to our overall mission. We are committed to a culture that is open, ethical, and collaborative, embraces excellence, respects diversity of thought, and encourages diversity among its faculty, staff and students.

School Vision

To be recognized nationally and internationally as a leader in pharmacy education, research and service that partners effectively with others to promote the discovery, development and appropriate use of medications for the welfare and safety of the public.

Mission Statement

Instructional: We educate student pharmacists to work in partnership with other health professionals to provide accessible, compassionate, and integrative pharmaceutical care with the goal of enhancing patient outcomes. In addition, we provide high quality graduate and post-graduate education tailored to foundational and advanced training in the pharmaceutical, clinical and health outcomes sciences.

Research and Discovery: We provide scientific leadership through development of innovative research programs in the biomedical sciences, conduct basic, translational and outcomes research, and make informed decisions at preclinical, clinical and post-approval stages of drug discovery, development and implementation.

Service: We serve patients and the wider community as committed and compassionate leaders in the use of our knowledge and discoveries to help develop and disseminate solutions to complex healthcare problems and promote the health and well-being of regional, national and global populations.

Educational Philosophy Statement

The goal of the PharmD program is to ensure our graduates possess the knowledge, skills, and abilities necessary to render care in an evolving health care system. Our educational experiences are designed to provide a strong foundation in the biomedical, socio-behavioral, administrative, clinical, and pharmaceutical sciences, a heightened understanding of the economic, cultural and social issues affecting patients and health care delivery, and the ability to apply this knowledge in collaboration with others to further practice, education, and research. Students are also encouraged, through professional and community outreach activities, to develop and incorporate new practices that enhance public health, systems management, and patient-centered care in diverse populations and settings. 

Strategic Plan

The School of Pharmacy 2010 Strategic Plan addresses the instructional, research and service missions of the School. Because these missions are highly interrelated, there is a unifying focus of the strategic plan: to promote “the safe, rational and cost-effective use of pharmaceuticals in patients and populations.” Read the Strategic Plan (PDF).

FACTS & HIGHLIGHTS 2013

At the University of Washington School of Pharmacy, we are committed to educating the next generation of leaders in pharmacy, pharmaceutical research and health care — while seeking to ensure the safe, rational and cost-effective use of medicines. View a PDF of our Facts and Highlights.

MISSION STATEMENT

• Instructional: We educate student pharmacists to work in partnership with other health professionals to provide accessible, compassionate, and integrative pharmaceutical care with the goal of enhancing patient outcomes. In addition, we provide high quality graduate and post-graduate education tailored to foundational and advanced training in the pharmaceutical, clinical and health outcomes sciences.
• Research and Discovery: We provide scientific leadership through development of innovative research programs in the biomedical sciences, conduct basic, translational and outcomes research, and make informed decisions at preclinical, clinical and post-approval stages of drug discovery, development and implementation.
• Service: We serve patients and the wider community as committed and compassionate leaders in the use of our knowledge and discoveries to help develop and disseminate solutions to complex healthcare problems and promote the health and well-being of regional, national and global populations.

OUR DEAN: Thomas A. Baillie, PhD, DSc

OUR STUDENTS

PharmD Students: 381
PhD Students: 59 
MS Students: 40

PharmD Student Demographics & Statistics:

American Indian/Native Alaskan: 1%
Asian, Pacific Islander & Hawaiian: 53%
Black 1%
Hispanic 3%
White 36%
Other: 4%
***
Female: 64%
Male: 36%
***
The North American Pharmacist Licensure Examination (NAPLEX) pass rate for 2013 PharmD graduates who took the exam in 2013 was 100%. 
The Multistate Pharmacy Jurisprudence Examination (MPJE) pass rate for 2013 was 93.55%. 
The on-time graduation rate for the Class of 2013 was 88%. 
More than 34 percent of PharmD graduates from the class of 2014 have been selected for PGY1 residencies, fellowships or other postgraduate opportunities.

DEPARTMENTS & PROGRAMS

Under the leadership of Dean Thomas A. Baillie, PhD, DSc, the School of Pharmacy has 42 full-time equivalent faculty members. The following departments and programs are each centers of excellence in their own right: 

Department of Medicinal Chemistry
Conducting research in drug metabolism, bio-analytical chemistry and the biophysical characterization of viral protein assembly
Chair: Allan E. Rettie, PhD 

Department of Pharmaceutics
Conducting research in pharmacokinetics and drug disposition
Chair: Kenneth E. Thummel, PhD 

Department of Pharmacy
Leading in pharmacy education, research, and professional and outreach initiatives
Chair: Peggy S. Odegard, PharmD 

Pharmaceutical Outcomes Research & Policy Program
Conducting research in pharmaceutical economics, drug safety and pharmaceutical policy
Director: Sean D. Sullivan, PhD

RANKINGS

• We are the No. 10 ranked pharmacy school in the nation, according to U.S. News & World Report.  
• Faculty secured more than $14 million in overall research funding in fiscal year 2013.
• In fiscal year 2012, we received $9.1 million in National Institutes of Health grant funding.

EDUCATIONAL OFFERINGS

Professional Degree: Doctor of Pharmacy (PharmD) 
Master of Science (MS): Medicinal Chemistry, Pharmaceutical Outcomes Research & Policy Program (PORPP), Pharmaceutics, Professional MS in Biomedical Regulatory Affairs 
Doctor of Philosophy (PhD): Medicinal Chemistry, Pharmaceutics, PORPP 
Concurrent Degrees: PharmD/Physician Assistant, PharmD/MS, PharmD/PhD 
Certificate Programs: Biomedical Regulatory Affairs, Clinical Trials, Comparative Effectiveness Research, Health Economics and Outcomes Research, Plein Certificate in Geriatric Pharmacy 
Residency Programs: Ambulatory Care, Community Pharmacy, Critical Care, General Residency, Oncology, Pharmacy Management/Master of Health Administration

AWARDS & HONORS

• Faculty hold leadership roles in associations including the American Association of Colleges of Pharmacy, American Association of Pharmaceutical Scientists (AAPS), American Chemical Society, American Society for Pharmacology and Experimental Therapeutics (ASPET), International Society for Pharmacoeconomics and Outcomes Research (ISPOR) and the International Society for the Study of Xenobiotics.
• Recent faculty honors include an AAPS Research Achievement in Biotechnology Award, an AAPS Research Achievement in Pharmacokinetics, Pharmacodynamics, and Drug Metabolism Award, an Early Career Achievement Award from ASPET, and an American Society for Parenteral and Enteral Nutrition Distinguished Nutrition Support Pharmacist Service Award.
• Recent student honors include two UW Thomas Francis, Jr., Global Health Fellowships, an ISPOR Distinguished Service Award, and a Chapter Achievement Award for our student chapter of the American Pharmacists Association-Academy of Student Pharmacists.

RESOURCES & RESEARCH CENTERS

• Analytical Biopharmacy Core
• Bracken Pharmacy Learning Center
• DNA Sequencing and Gene Analysis Center
• Mass Spectrometry Center
• Metabolism and Transport Drug Interaction Database
• Northwest-Alaska Pharmacogenomics Research Network
• Pharmacokinetics Lab
• UW Obstetric-Fetal Pharmacology Research Unit
• UW Pharmacy Cares Consulting Pharmacy
• UW Research Affiliates Program on Transporters

FISCAL YEAR 2013 REVENUE: $34 MILLION

FUN FACTS

• The School (then College) of Pharmacy was founded in 1894 as the third college at the UW.
• Louis D. Bracken, the inventor of the original “Blistex” lip ointment, attended the College of Pharmacy in 1912 and 1913.
• Bill Stavropoulos, PhD in Medicinal Chemistry, ’67, served as president, COO and chairman of Dow Chemical Company.
• George Bartell, Jr., ’53, was the president and CEO of Bartell Drugs for 44 years. Bartell was the son of the founder of the family-owned drug store chain, which is the nation’s oldest.
• Impel NeuroPharma, a company seeking to enable drugs to bypass the blood-brain barrier, was co-founded in 2008 by Professor of Pharmaceutics Rodney Ho and John Hoekman, PhD, ’10.
• UW Pharmacy Cares, founded at the School of Pharmacy in 2008, was the first ever non-dispensing, medication-therapy-management-focused pharmacy licensed in the state of Washington.

 

University of Washington School of Pharmacy's Doctor of Pharmacy programis accredited by the Accreditation Council for Pharmacy Education, 135 South LaSalle Street, Suite 4100, Chicago, IL 60503, 312-664-3575, FAX 312-664-4652,www.acpe-accredit.org.

 http://sop.washington.edu/school-of-pharmacy/

would see his show again anytime, any age.

morphing sadness into humor. remember when used to think 'just so sad sometimes.' being sad for no reason, choosing to focus on sorrow. finding the medium between allowing negativity yet recognizing the positive foundation beneath it all and any. 

최근들어 슬픔 어려움에도 불구하고 행복하다는 생각이든다. 더 이상 무엇을 바라리 .. 언제나 항시 괜찮으리라는 이 또한 지나리라는 확신을 지니고 지낼 수 있다는 것. 이러한 생활에 대한 존재조차 알지 못 하던, 모른는 것은 모르는 세월들을 지나, 만사 무관한 행복 안정을 찾았음에, 더 할나위 없이 감사. 그 만큼 나는 지금 그리고 평생동안 사람을 담뿍 받으며 자라왔구나, 성장했구나 싶은 마음. 이 만큼 넘치는 사랑을 받은 시간들을 앞으로 나도 실천하여 아낌 아쉬움 없는, 넘치는 사랑을 나누며 생활하리 다짐.                        

because i'm alone and it's there,  because i'm alone and it's there, breaking all my         

---

살인자의 기억법

저자

김영하 지음

출판사

문학동네 | 2013-07-25 출간

카테고리

소설

책소개

첫 문장의 강렬함이 채 사라지기 전에 마지막 문장의 마침표까지,...

글쓴이 평점  

---

읽으며 단상 : 

옆으로 누워 소설을 읽는다. 하품을하니 눈물이 흐른다. 촉이 좋아 괜히 하품으로 눈물을 흘린다. 터인 수로로 물이 계속 흐른다, 빠르게.

감정 감정 감정 치매를 겪으며 기억을 잃고 현실을 잃은 이도 감정은 남는다고 한다. 나는 지금까지 많은 이들에게 무려 가깝다는 이들에게도 감정을 아꼈지 싶은 생각이 들며 미안해야하나 싶다가도 되려 그렇지만도 않았는데 - 싶다. 상대적이며 아무도 모를 것이 감정의 정도이다. 오히려 불필요 할 지도.

비밀 하나 안지 않고 살아간다는 것이 얼마나 복인지는, 잊지 말아야한다. 감사한 삶.

그만 두고 싶어 그만 둔 일이 있었다. 일 처리는 빨랐다. 스스로에게 선물한 빠른 해방. 나는 책임감이 낮은 것일까 싶다가 남이나 시스템을 위해 나를 희생치 않는 자기애가 많은 것이라 싶다. 둘의 그리고 여럿의 조합이겠지.

막장을 덮고 : 

오랜만의 소설. 거침없이 읽히는 여름의 추리. 이 정도 페이스는 반전을 향함이라는 당연함이 느껴질 정도로 휙휙 넘겨지는 단락들. 특정히 문체가 아름답다거나 반전이 환상이라거나 싶은 굉장함은 없지만 정성이과 본능이 읽히는 글. 재미 .. 는 없음. 통찰은 나의 부족함이지 싶어 판단 불가능.

알츠하이머 치매라는 질병에 대해 오히려 관심을 갖게되는 바가 중심으로 남는다. 기억은 사라져도 감정은 남는다는 문구. 기억 할 수 없을 사람을 대하는 진심이야말로 아름답다싶다. 알아주지 않는 기록되지 않는, 선행. 반면 나는 상대가 갈구하는, 무려 또렷히 기억 할 감정 조차 나누지 않은 기억이 든다. 단연코 필요한 minimum 이상에 대해서 나는 제법 차가웠지 싶다. 하물며, appreciate 되지 않을 사랑에 대해 나는 얼만큼 베풀 수 있을까. 인색한가.

유태인 말로 세다가 sedaka 라고 하는데 다른 사람에게 베풀고 선행을 베푸는 겁니다.

시장이 끝날 때에는 이렇게 물건을 내다 놓습니다. 그러면 가난한 사람들이 가져갑니다.

resist stronger, do not tolerate

정직 솔직 꾸준 열심 투자 

감사

춥고 졸리고 주말의 마무리, 곧 여름의 마감. 마음도 몸도 쉴 시간. 눈꺼풀은 얇고도 따가웁다 .. 숨은 짧고도 얕다. 밤은 깊는데 잠을 버틴다. 나의 시간 나의 피살붙이가 나의 것만은 아니라는 생각이 든다. 머리가 아프고 마음이 탁구공냥 비어있다. 너는 뒤척이며 묻고싶은 질문을 삼킨듯, 하다. 

한 명보다 둘이, 둘보다 셋이 보다 생산적인 토론을 조성한다는 교육방침. 나는 적절 이상의 시간을 혼자이지 않았는가, 앞으로의 나는 보다 적극적이어야하는가. 

보다 나은 시민이 되기 위함 to be better citizens

유대인들은 6 - 13 세 어린이들을 방과후 히브리 학교에 참석시킨단다. 주차장에서 아이를 내려주는 모왈, 유대 문화와 언어만을 배우기 위함이 아니라 시민으로써의 자질들을 배우기 위함이라고. 준비되지 않은 인터뷰에서 교육에 대한 철학을 저 만큼 즉흥적으로 훌륭히 답 할 수 있음은 그 만큼의 기반이 있음이리. 

나의 부모는 얼만큼 훌륭하셨는지, 그 감사한 마음과 나는 그것의 얼만큼을 나의 자녀에게 베풀 수 있을지 궁금하다. 공부의 필요성이 절실. 

기부 to give 

이제서야 다가오는 의미와 그 중요함. 어려서 머리카락 손질마저 매일 엄마의 손에 맡기던 시절부터, 엄마는 나눔을 가르치었지 - 싶다. 겨울이면 십자군함에 천원 오천원 만원, 넣고 오라며 나의 손에 쥐어주시던 엄마. 다리에 타이어따위를 메고 다리를 저시는 아저씨의 바구니에, 넣으라며 주어주시던 일이천원. 말씀을 못 하시는 아저씨시라며, 지날 때 마다 국화빵 호떡따위를 팔아주시던 엄마. 재난이 일어나면 전화통화로 기부금을 보내시고, 생활 아쉬운 아이들이 이 나라에 너무나 많다며 일몇십만원씩 보탬을 보내시던 모습.

내 아무리 아쉬운 살림이라 할지라도 굶는 끼니 한 끼 없고, 아쉬움은 커녕 풍족한 학업 생활 환경 속에서만 자라온 날들. 나눌 수 있음을 잊다가도 기억케 하는 것은 엄마가 어려부터 심어주신 심성이지 싶다. 엄마란, .. 

나에게 가장 가까운

sometimes i just do not understand, and maybe i don't need to. nope don't need to. 

친구가 계획되지 않은 출산으로 의대입학을 미루었단다. 시간이 흘러 우리가 꿈에 가까워졌음에 놀랍고, 그가 가장이 될 것이라는 것에 신기하다. 우리는 시험공부 따위를 어렵다고 징징대던 날들이 있었는데. 학부생활도 석사과정도, 의대입학 조차도, 그가 어렵다고 느껴지던 것들이 아무것도 아닌 것이 되었다더라. 아이를 위하여 시간적 금전적 가능성을 모두 모아 투자하는 것이, 쉽지 않다며. 곁을 걸어지나가는 낯선 아가들을 보며 미소가 지어지고, 아가라는 존재만 생각해도 보람됨을 느낀다는 아빠의 모습이 마냥 .. 좋지도 신기하지도 낯설지도 어색하지도 멋지지도 않은, 모르겠는 어중간함으로 다가온다. 경험하지 못한 것에 준비하려는, 의도된 수용의 마음인가. 

considering options towards expanding options. education investment. 

연기아닌 진정성, 슬픔을 웃김으로 위장 .. 에너지 시간을 한 틈도 아끼지 않았던 아름다웠던 그의 표현들 .. 이 기록으로나마 남아 다행. 

스스로 죽음을 원했다니, 그의 모든 퍼포먼스가 슬픔으로 다가온다, 슬픔. 

his self induced death transformed all his performances into sadness. 

i remember thinking he is the most insane man ever, might be true.

allure or excitement 

see the worst in people to appreciate the best

never want to be governed by fear 

watching nicole film for lynn hirschberg : confirms life beautiful 

need exercise must

쭉쭉쭉 진도 progress 

escape into virginia, she felt much safer than where i was, not comfortable with myself at that time in my life

comfortable with self 

behavior is mutable 

innate poise 

spells

me 

to let go and be free. to be healthy. to sit up straight and recognize moments as being alive.

stronger focus on physique and time management. 

physical strength

spiritual well being

time management

balanced, wholesome nutrition 

to spend myself for those i love

the things i return to every single time, my center and focus. the factors to my happiness.

sleep and digestion have been difficult. relying somewhat on medication. 

together

to spend time with someone for an extended period of time, calls for intentional distancing. reminding self of boundaries and expectations from myself and counterpart. 상대가 나를 너무 편하게 대한다 싶었는데 나 또한 그러했음을, 인지. 오히려 상대의 편안함을 초래했을지도라는 perspective alteration. 

school 

time management 

stay inspired 

friends

fb book club reactivation with jin and a few others. 

being able to share with a few what cannot be shared with all, availability of private conversations. appreciation for time and thought. 누구나와 아닌 누군가와만 공유 할 수 있는 시간 및 주제. having someone tell me that they understand how i feel. having someone take the time to listen and opinion on topics of my concern. 

family 

just wrote to mom dad and changjun, purposely with no particular reason. just an overview of my summer. going through possible improvements. recognizing my summer 2014, these moments this time will never be available to me. recognizing that a day's time is enough to achieve many. 

to keep something to self vs. to share what is on my mind. shared all with all. clarified and realized unimaginable. glad.

materialistic

to recognize great quality regardless of price. also to understand and practice reasonable purchasing habits. to void ridiculousness. to be considerate of those in greater need. to fulfill practical needs with quality standards without forgetting others who i am in position to help. 

sponsorship 

remembering that i have enough at all times to share even if it is something as little as a dollar.

2:07 

place in her crazy, where she loves who she is

have no concept of failure, become more aware of mortality as you get older, you're little and you're brave and you jump on a horse. as you get older you realize how fragile your life is and your job is and you become more careful.

status updates : 

family 

- superb 

- spending much time / spirit with Chang jun 

friends

- shifting well / mediocre 

finance

- medical bills

- camping / traveling

spirit

- superb

- positive / happy 

physical 

- great / healthy 

- eating well

- need exercise 

academics

- well on track 8 weeks to school

- exam prep

- need text books 

etc.

- immunization in progress near finished

- church baptism 

- plan for next year

self reminder to keep high spirit. alternating days of positive and negative. does not do the balance. need to remain closer to neutral. 

study and exercise, zero and one 01010101 0011 0010100100 1010100 - that is all. to consider nothing else as significant, everything else as means of sustainability, no more than only necessary. 

this is absolutely beautiful, the best 

https://www.ted.com/talks/john_wooden_on_the_difference_between_winning_and_success 

I coined my own definition of success in 1934, when I was teaching at a high school in South Bend, Indiana, being a little bit disappointed, and delusioned perhaps, by the way parents of the youngsters in my English classes expected their youngsters to get an A or a B. They thought a C was all right for the neighbors' children, because the neighbors children are all average. But they weren't satisfied when their own -- would make the teacher feel that they had failed, or the youngster had failed. And that's not right. The good Lord in his infinite wisdom didn't create us all equal as far as intelligence is concerned, any more than we're equal for size, appearance. Not everybody could earn an A or a B, and I didn't like that way of judging it.

0:54And I did know how the alumni of various schools back in the 30s judged coaches and athletic teams. If you won them all, you were considered to be reasonably successful -- not completely. Because I found out -- we had a number of years at UCLA where we didn't lose a game. But it seemed that we didn't win each individual game by the margin that some of our alumni had predicted and quite frequently I -- (Laughter) -- quite frequently I really felt that they had backed up their predictions in a more materialistic manner. But that was true back in the 30s, so I understood that. But I didn't like it. And I didn't agree with it. And I wanted to come up with something that I hoped could make me a better teacher, and give the youngsters under my supervision -- whether it be in athletics or in the English classroom -- something to which to aspire, other than just a higher mark in the classroom, or more points in some athletic contest.

1:51I thought about that for quite a spell, and I wanted to come up with my own definition. I thought that might help. And I knew how Mr. Webster defined it: as the accumulation of material possessions or the attainment of a position of power or prestige, or something of that sort -- worthy accomplishments perhaps, but in my opinion not necessarily indicative of success. So I wanted to come up with something of my own.

2:14And I recalled -- I was raised on a small farm in Southern Indiana and Dad tried to teach me and my brothers that you should never try to be better than someone else. I'm sure at the time he did that, I didn't -- it didn't -- well, somewhere, I guess in the hidden recesses of mind, it popped out years later. Never try to be better than someone else, always learn from others. Never cease trying to be the best you can be -- that's under your control. If you get too engrossed and involved and concerned in regard to the things over which you have no control, it will adversely affect the things over which you have control. Then I ran across this simple verse that said, "At God's footstool to confess, a poor soul knelt, and bowed his head. 'I failed!' He cried. The Master said, 'Thou didst thy best, that is success.'"

3:01From those things, and one other perhaps, I coined my own definition of success, which is: peace of mind attained only through self-satisfaction in knowing you made the effort to do the best of which you're capable. I believe that's true. If you make the effort to do the best of which you're capable, to try and improve the situation that exists for you, I think that's success. And I don't think others can judge that. I think it's like character and reputation. Your reputation is what you are perceived to be; your character is what you really are. And I think that character is much more important than what you are perceived to be. You'd hope they'd both be good, but they won't necessarily be the same. Well, that was my idea that I was going to try to get across to the youngsters.

3:43I ran across other things. I love to teach, and it was mentioned by the previous speaker that I enjoy poetry, and I dabble in it a bit, and love it.There are some things that helped me, I think, be better than I would have been. I know I'm not what I ought to be, not what I should be. But I think I'm better than I would have been if I hadn't run across certain things. One was just a little verse that said,

4:06"No written word, no spoken plea can teach our youth what they should be. Nor all the books on all the shelves -- it's what the teachers are themselves."

4:18That made an impression on me in the 1930s. And I tried to use that more or less in my teaching, whether it be in sports, or whether it be in the English classroom. I love poetry and always had an interest in that somehow. Maybe it's because Dad used to read to us at night. Coal oil lamp -- we didn't have electricity in our farm home. And Dad would read poetry to us. So I always liked it. And about the same time I ran across this one verse, I ran across another one. Someone asked a lady teacher why she taught. And she -- after some time, she said she wanted to think about that. Then she came up and said,

5:01"They ask me why I teach and I reply, 'Where could I find such splendid company?' There sits a statesman, strong, unbiased, wise; another Daniel Webster, silver-tongued. A doctor sits beside him, whose quick steady hand may mend a bone, or stem the life-blood's flow. And there a builder. Upward rise the arch of a church he builds, wherein that minister may speak the word of God and lead a stumbling soul to touch the Christ. And all about a gathering of teachers, farmers, merchants, laborers: those who work and vote and build and plan and pray into a great tomorrow. And I may say, I may not see the church, or hear the word or eat the food their hands may grow. But yet again I may. And later I may say, I knew him once, and he was weak, or strong, or bold or proud or gay. I knew him once, but then he was a boy. They ask me why I teach and I reply, 'Where could I find such splendid company?'"

5:55And I believe the teaching profession -- it's true, you have so many youngsters. And I've got to think of my youngsters at UCLA -- 30-some attorneys, 11 dentists and doctors, many, many teachers and other professions. And that gives you a great deal of pleasure, to see them go on. I always tried to make the youngsters feel that they're there to get an education, number one. Basketball was second, because it was paying their way, and they do need a little time for social activities, but you let social activities take a little precedence over the other two and you're not going to have any very long. So that was the ideas that I tried to get across to the youngsters under my supervision.

6:38I had three rules, pretty much, that I stuck with practically all the time. I'd learned these prior to coming to UCLA, and I decided they were very important. One was -- never be late. Never be late. Later on I said certain things -- I had -- players, if we're leaving for somewhere, had to be neat and clean. There was a time when I made them wear jackets and shirts and ties. Then I saw our chancellor coming to school in denims and turtlenecks, and I thought, not right for me to keep this other. So I let them -- just they had to be neat and clean. I had one of my greatest players that you probably heard of, Bill Walton. He came to catch the bus; we were leaving for somewhere to play. And he wasn't clean and neat, so I wouldn't let him go. He couldn't get on the bus. He had to go home and get cleaned up to get to the airport. So I was a stickler for that. I believed in that. I believe in time -- very important. I believe you should be on time. But I felt at practice, for example, we start on time, we close on time.The youngsters didn't have to feel that we were going to keep them over.

7:47When I speak at coaching clinics, I often tell young coaches -- and at coaching clinics, more or less, they'll be the younger coaches getting in the profession. Most of them are young, you know, and probably newly married. And I tell them, "Don't run practices late. Because you'll go home in a bad mood. And that's not good, for a young married man to go home in a bad mood. When you get older, it doesn't make any difference." But --

8:09(Laughter)

8:14So I did believe on time. I believe starting on time, and I believe closing on time. And another one I had was, not one word of profanity. One word of profanity, and you are out of here for the day. If I see it in a game, you're going to come out and sit on the bench. And the third one was, never criticize a teammate. I didn't want that. I used to tell them I was paid to do that. That's my job. I'm paid to do it. Pitifully poor, but I am paid to do it. Not like the coaches today, for gracious sakes, no. It's a little different than it was in my day. Those were three things that I stuck with pretty closely all the time. And those actually came from my dad. That's what he tried to teach me and my brothers at one time.

8:57I came up with a pyramid eventually, that I don't have the time to go on that. But that helped me, I think, become a better teacher. It's something like this: And I had blocks in the pyramid, and the cornerstones being industriousness and enthusiasm, working hard and enjoying what you're doing, coming up to the apex according to my definition of success. And right at the top -- faith and patience. And I say to you, in whatever you're doing, you must be patient. You have to have patience to -- we want things to happen. We talk about our youth being impatient a lot. And they are. They want to change everything. They think all change is progress. And we get a little older -- we sort of let things go. And we forget there is no progress without change. So you must have patience. And I believe that we must have faith. I believe that we must believe, truly believe. Not just give it word service; believe that things will work out as they should, providing we do what we should. I think our tendency is to hope that things will turn out the way we want them to much of the time. But we don't do the things that are necessary to make those things become reality.I worked on this for some 14 years, and I think it helped me become a better teacher. But it all revolved around that original definition of success.

10:18You know a number of years ago, there was a Major League Baseball umpire by the name of George Moriarty. He spelled Moriarty with only one 'i'. I'd never seen that before, but he did. Big league baseball players -- they're very perceptive about those things, and they noticed he had only one 'i' in his name. You'd be surprised how many also told him that that was one more than he had in his head at various times.

10:43(Laughter)

10:45But he wrote something that I think he did while I tried to do in this pyramid. He called it "The Road Ahead, or the Road Behind." "Sometimes I think the Fates must grin as we denounce them and insist the only reason we can't win, is the Fates themselves that miss. Yet there lives on the ancient claim: we win or lose within ourselves. The shining trophies on our shelves can never win tomorrow's game. You and I know deeper down, there's always a chance to win the crown. But when we fail to give our best, we simply haven't met the test, of giving all and saving none until the game is really won; of showing what is meant by grit; of playing through when others quit; of playing through, not letting up. It's bearing down that wins the cup. Of dreaming there's a goal ahead; of hoping when our dreams are dead; of praying when our hopes have fled. Yet losing, not afraid to fall, if bravely we have given all. For who can ask more of a man than giving all within his span. Giving all, it seems to me, is not so far from victory. And so the fates are seldom wrong, no matter how they twist and wind. It's you and I who make our fates -- we open up or close the gates on the road ahead or the road behind."

11:51Reminds me of another set of threes that my dad tried to get across to us. Don't whine. Don't complain. Don't make excuses. Just get out there, and whatever you're doing, do it to the best of your ability. And no one can do more than that. I tried to get across, too, that -- my opponents don't tell you -- you never heard me mention winning. Never mention winning. My idea is that you can lose when you outscore somebody in a game. And you can win when you're outscored. I've felt that way on certain occasions, at various times. And I just wanted them to be able to hold their head up after a game. I used to say that when a game is over, and you see somebody that didn't know the outcome, I hope they couldn't tell by your actions whether you outscored an opponent or the opponent outscored you.

12:42That's what really matters: if you make effort to do the best you can regularly, the results will be about what they should be. Not necessary to what you would want them to be, but they will be about what they should, and only you will know whether you can do that. And that's what I wanted from them more than anything else. And as time went by, and I learned more about other things, I think it worked a little better, as far as the results. But I wanted the score of a game to be the byproduct of these other things, and not the end itself. I believe it was -- one great philosopher said -- no, no, Cervantes. Cervantes said, "The journey is better than the end." And I like that. I think that is -- it's getting there. Sometimes when you get there, there's almost a letdown. But there's getting there that's the fun. I liked our -- as a basketball coach at UCLA I liked our practices to be the journey, and the game would be the end. The end result. I'd like to go up and sit in the stands and watch the players play, and see whether I'd done a decent job during the week. There again, it's getting the players to get that self-satisfaction, in knowing that they'd made the effort to do the best of which they are capable.

14:03Sometimes I'm asked who was the best player I had, or the best teams. I can never answer that, as far as the individuals are concerned. I was asked one time about that, and they said, "Suppose that you in some way could make the perfect player. What would you want?" And I said, "Well, I'd want one that knew why he was at UCLA: to get an education, he was a good student, really knew why he was there in the first place.But I'd want one that could play, too. I'd want one to realize that defense usually wins championships, and would work hard on defense. But I'd want one that would play offense too. I'd want him to be unselfish, and look for the pass first and not shoot all the time. And I'd want one that could pass and would pass.

14:51(Laughter)

14:52I've had some that could and wouldn't, and I've had some that would and couldn't.

14:56(Laughter)

15:00I wanted them to be able to shoot from the outside. I wanted them to be good inside too.

15:05(Laughter)

15:08I'd want them to be able to rebound well at both ends, too. And why not just take someone like Keith Wilkes and let it go at that. He had the qualifications. Not the only one, but he was one that I used in that particular category, because I think he made the effort to become the best [unclear].

15:27I mention in my book, "They Call Me Coach." Two players that gave me great satisfaction; that came as close as I think anyone I ever had to reach their full potential: one was Conrad Burke. And one was Doug McIntosh. When I saw them as freshmen, on our freshmen team -- we didn't have -- freshmen couldn't play varsity when I taught. And I thought, "Oh gracious, if these two players, either one of them" -- they were different years, but I thought about each one at the time he was there -- "Oh, if he ever makes the varsity, our varsity must be pretty miserable, if he's good enough to make it." And you know one of them was a starting player for a season and a half. The other was -- his next year, he played 32 minutes in a national championship game, did a tremendous job for us. And the next year, he was a starting player on the national championship team. And here I thought he'd never play a minute, when he was -- so those are the things that give you great joy, and great satisfaction to see one. Neither one of those youngsters could shoot very well. But they had outstanding shooting percentages, because they didn't force it. And neither one could jump very well, but they got -- kept good position, and so they did well rebounding. They remembered that every shot that is taken, they assumed would be missed. I've had too many that stand around and wait to see if it's missed, then they go and it's too late. Somebody else is in there ahead of them. And they weren't very quick, but they played good position, kept in good balance. And so they played pretty good defense for us. So they had qualities that -- they came close to -- as close to reaching possibly their full potential as any players I ever had. So I consider them to be as successful as Lewis Alcindor or Bill Walton, or many of the others that we had, There was some outstanding -- some outstanding players.

17:17Have I rambled enough? I was told that when he makes his appearance, I was supposed to shut up.

17:24(Laughter) (Applause)

무엇이든 행복 즐거운 마음으로, 어려움 없이 편안히 - 진심으로 침착히 하루하루 매일매일.

June

nearing end of work. summer shall be much of 

- cooking

- yoga 

- tanning

- studying 

to write something for five minutes

monday morning passed so quick, too quick almost. work seems bearable than past week with the thought of possible options given to the case. remembering the first attitude and approach to work. recognizing the possibilities of learning and gaining value through experience. 

have been in conversation with mom about possibly visiting california and taking time off late summer. blessed to have such support regardless of my decisions. 

hour seems short but weeks to come seem a bit long. many things to schedule this week for upcoming move and transition. excited to be on own. haven't been without a housemate for almost three years .. being alone seemed less favorable until now, but apparently things have changed. am excited to have a space of own. 

heard back from about an internship program. much excited to be moving forward into a new field of career. concerns are always there but never significant enough to bring forth complaint. nothing to complaint about, adequately comfortable, have been for such the longest time. should and am appreciative of the blessing and protection - from many and all.

greed, letting go of unneeded things.. breathe longer, take time .. emailed mom about current stress factors: phone and interview. 

폰 부주의해서 분실하고 돈 낭비, 시간낭비 할일이 많아도 차근 차근 언제나 침착하게 살자..

바빠도 침착함을 의식하면서 행동하다보면  좋은 습관이 네 몸에 배이겠지..

이번일로 침착함을 배웠다 생각하면 가치가있을듯..

사소한일이라 지나치면 시간지나서 더 큰 화를 부를수도있겠고..

이번 세월호 사건만 보더라도 그래..

우리 각자 침착하게 차분하게 좋은습관을 길들이자..

암튼 인터뷰 차분하게 보면 될듯한데..^^

그런 노력하는 마음이 갸륵하구나..

편히 잘 자구 일어나 또 건강한 하루 감사한 마음.기쁜 마음으로 지내면

하느님에 좋은기운(은총)안에서 모든 일이 잘되리라 믿는다..

오~감사하고 행복한 날이여..

엄마도 한학기 마무리하는 시간이라서 과제물이 2개 해야할일이있네..

마무리하고 제출해야 부담감이 없겠네..

또 연락하고 언능 전화기도 구입하길..

아쉽지만 이만 안녕~^^ 

a privilege to have family so close .. miss home. 아쉽지만 안녕 ..... missing home. so sad sometimes, want to cry. but shall pass. 

to write something for five minutes

apartment, be at one location move to another then to another .. passing time year by year, experiencing best of the worlds. having the opportunity and time to compare, allows greater appreciation and need. satisfactory transition. to a more comfortable location for the spirit. reduce stress factors. might need to clean and discard much .. 

school, preparing self for a new lifestyle. planning and distributing time and energy with balance, not to be haste, minimize mistakes and waste. as mom advised, to be slow and calm. 

the beginner's luck 초심 the alchemist 연금술사. having the readiness and attention level of a learner. not to abuse the luck of the beginner, recognizing that luck stems from self preparation. taking the time to observe others as models of avoidable decisions as well as role models. 

give space and time. balance. reviewing options with further point in time in mind, 멀리 보고 내리는 결정. recognizing the butterfly effects of the decisions made. keeping focus on love of self and others.

to love and let love. to show and let know - to share. 

reflecting on the week before, disappointment in self for being disorganized, for not allowing enough time to plan. for wasting time and energy, paying for the cost of less efficiency. reflecting on this week - learning from the last. feeling good about having had enough time to proceed each task with 여유. not having to be haste and nor waste. 

"nobody loves you like i do"

sometimes everything seems so sad for no reason. then again at times there are also times of being happy from no particular as well. sometimes balance seems to have been automated. but then again, positivity brings positivity - balance is a product of self induced practice and focus driven direction. remembering importance of paying attention to the happy happenings of the day, of the week, of the year. appreciating the good relationships - relationships which encourage and teach, which help to better me and which allow me to help better them. 

나 하기 나름인 것 인데 - 라며 반성.. when you're like oh please god then he's like nope. 굳이 1으로인한 2가 아니라 2로 인한 3도 1의 몫임을, 나비효과. to be more cautious and sensual, watchful and considerate. observe all on smaller scales. 가까이 자세히 보는 습관이 필요함을 다시 기억, 의식적으로 지내기 매 순간 시간 하루.

can do them myself, but fun when someone does them for me 

be the self person around me 

type of woman i want to be 

who do i want to attract 

easy to be strong and confident when haven't been torn down 

stronger when you have reasons to be insecure and you're not 

been through difficult things, BUT have a choice to react - to the situation 

will i grow or put up a wall and shrivel 

3 compliments that works every time validate 

- such a guy 

- i feel safe around you, i like that (masculinity, protection, more of a man) 

- you're so great, i feel bad for other women i get to spend all my time with you (special )

most romantic

1 - candle lit dinner

2 - hand written note 

 unromantic romantic 

1. see their favorite movie (put initiative to see it, book the ticket)

2. surprise them at office with their favorite lunch (bring it to the office)

3. bubble candle music bath, and leave the place, give space

4. take her mom out to lunch (take the check, show a great time)

conversationalist

1. get out of your head

2. pay attention to the environment

3. have an opinion about the happening in the environment 

"am i right in saying ... "